When it comes to the idea of an outsider identity’s the first thing that comes to mind when hearing such a term is a facade. A facade the aptest way of describing it, because your outsider identity isn’t truly your true self. It’s your shield you put up against the world around you in order to conform to society the way you see best fit. So modulating your outsider identity would simply just be changing your “identity” that you allow the world to see, to best fit the situation you are placed in.
I think every single person has an outsider aspect of their identity, we all change something about ourselves in order to conform to society. This has been an age-old thing, from the very minor details in someone all the way to change your whole identity by means of survival. People have been adjusting themselves according to society for hundreds of years. If you want to think about it at an extreme level, think of the LGBTQ+ community and their struggles to fit into society when society wasn’t nearly as accepting as it is today. People would have to repress their identities in order to essentially protect their lives, lest they be ousted, and face the consequences of society. So they adjusted accordingly, while also keeping their true selves on the down low, eventually coming up with signals to allow others that were apart of the LGBTQ+ community to recognize each other. This is a perfect, although an extreme example of outsider aspects in an identity.
There are some things that we do choose to hide from society, that we repress in our outsider identity, insecurities that we’re scared to be ridiculed for by society, or even disabilities that we’re terrified of others seeing. Speaking from experience, I’ve tended to be a person that has tried to shield away details about me from society that I’ve been afraid will invite ridicule upon my person. As someone who grew up getting bullied and dealt with severe bouts of depression, the outsider identity has become a safety blanket to me, hiding my insecurities from those who view me from the outside has been second nature.
I completely agree with the statement that its not normal to be completely normal, because who truly is normal? What exactly is deemed as normal? I’ve always begged to be normal when times were tough, and everything as if nothing would ever get better, but when I think of it what would “normal” get me? We strive to reach this term, that truly has no set definition in life. Why should I have to change myself in order to be seen as “normal” in society, because others deem me not to be. We throw the word normal around like its candy but we never give any actual thought to the meaning behind it, we just assume normal is exactly what the word is, normal.
